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Writer's pictureCarroll Golden

Finding Peace With a Plan

Peace may be defined by your state of mind, your state of being, or by the state of global affairs. Globally, we now are experiencing the end of ‘abundance thinking’ due to supply-chain disruptions, the pandemic, and the situation in the Ukraine. At least 70% of communication between ourselves and others is non-verbal. Observe how quickly children sense stress and anxiety without any real understanding of the issue-at-hand. Adult generations do the same. So when a family caregiver responds with ‘I’m fine,’ other family members know otherwise. So, how do you prepare?


In the story of the Jackson family, we see this family has used 3 Simple Steps to work out a plan for her parents that relieves caregiver Jodi of her deteriorating health, negative career and financial impacts, and family stress. Lesson learned combined with the recognition of the end of abundance thinking, Jodi wants to create a plan. She wants to create ‘peace’ within her own family regardless of the stress that comes with illness, aging, or state of mind. Jodi kicks off the meeting by sharing the social security online estimator which offers the average number of additional years a person can expect to live. While she cannot control the global situation, her goal is to create family peace and harmony.


Jackson kicks off the Zoom call by saying, “Let’s have

some fun! I shared a link in the chat box for a site that

allows us a peek at our expected longevity.

Nicole and Erik whip out their phones and start to play

with the calculator.


After the kids have announced their expected projected

longevity selves, and have sufficiently teased each other

and their parents, Jackson gets their attention. “I’m glad

you guys are enjoying this exercise. If you recall, while

doing the three simple steps with your grandparents, we

saw the impact of potential health-care costs on what

your grandparents thought was a solid retirement income

plan. You both have friends whose baby boomer parents

or relatives have health issues or are experiencing the

effects of aging.”


Looking pensive, Nicole says, “True, we can relate. Our

grandparents always seemed pretty healthy, but as they

grew older, they needed more and more help. Since it

was gradual, we sort of ignored it. Then the sudden

emergency, and everything changed.”


Sensitive to his mother’s not sharing the impact it might

have had on her finances, Erik ends the exchange on a

positive note. “Under the emotional and financial cost

umbrella, consequences might have spread far and wide.

Creating that plan to include funding for long-term

care expenses had a positive effect on their physical and

emotional well-being.”


Nicole gets her brother’s drift. “And on all of us too!”

Jackson is pleased that the complaint about work has

disappeared. He overreacted and was too sensitive. This

little exercise was fun and made all of them think about

the impact longevity can have on retirement and longterm

care funding.


-"How Not to Tear Your Family Apart"

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